Babyboomers.com

“Word of mouth” is how most families say they learn about adoption. Now, word of mouth has gone electronic via the Internet. Prospective adoptive families are choosing adoption agencies, talking to each other, and even finding children in need of families on the Internet.

Steve and Maureen Deyo turned to the Internet when they began to consider adopting a second child. The Deyos are both involved with the deaf community and were interested in adopting a two or three-year-old hearing-impaired child, from the U.S. The Deyos timetable called for them to adopt in a couple of years. Their son Christian had just turned two, and they wanted a second child to be about two years younger. But in February of 1995, less than a month after Steve began gathering information on the Internet, the Deyos received an e-mail listing of children in need of adoptive families from the Deaf Adoption News Service (DANS).

They were drawn to the description of a five-month-old from Colombia whose referral agency was Children’s Home Society of Minnesota, located in St. Paul where the Deyos lived. Setting timetables and considerations aside, the Deyos called the agency and set up an appointment. Four months later, they brought their son, Adam Martin, home from Colombia.

Steve and Maureen Deyo turned to the Internet when they began to consider adopting a second child.

The Deyos are just one of the thousands of families who have chosen the Internet to find adoption information. Over the past two years, news groups, chatrooms and adoption-related home pages have propagated. An adoption search under the DejaNews newsgroup search engine calls up more than 10,000 entries ranging from “Adoption in North Carolina” to “Failed Adoption Plan”, to “Adoption Success Stories.” A click on “My Adoption Home Page”, brings up a personal home page by a couple hoping to adopt and requesting help in locating a birth parent. The newsgroup “soc.adoption.adoptees” is widely used for discussion about searching for birth parents and/or adopted children.

Children’s Home Society of Minnesota, the agency who facilitated the Deyos’ adoption, has had a home page since last January. According to Margi Miller, International Adoption Program supervisor at Children’s Home Society of Minnesota, “We were using the Internet for e-mail to our out-of-state clients and to our international representatives, and as an informational source. With 15 adoption programs in Asia, Eastern Europe and Latin America, there’s a big cost savings over sending faxes to communicate to our international representatives. We also have had several requests from adoption-related sites such as the DANS for information about our programs and the children we placed. Developing our own home page seemed like the logical next step.”

Since they went on-line, Children’s Home Society has had more than 7000 people visit its site. About one third of the requests for information about its international adoption programs come from the web site. The home page also includes information about Pregnancy Counseling and Open Adoption, Post Adoption Services, and Tour Korea, an adoption-focused tour offered each summer for children and their families who have adopted from Korea. There are plans to expand the site further by adding a “What’s New” section that will include upcoming events, new programs and resources and program updates.

The Internet also provides a forum for adoptive families to interact with each other. One popular site, http://www.pshrink.com/chinadopt, is a collection of personal opinions and information developed by Edward Hume, M.D., an adoptive parent. It provides answers to frequently asked questions for parents who have adopted from China or who are currently in the process.

However, Children’s Home Society adoption program director David Pilgrim cautions, “As useful a tool as the Internet can be, readers shouldn’t assume everything they read is gospel. Many news groups are unmoderated and uncensored. Anybody with access can claim to be an expert and report any information they care to– there is no way to distinguish truth from fiction, or to detect distorted information. We encourage our clients to verify information.”

As long as an adoptive family understands the caveats, the Internet can help provide invaluable connections. The Deyos used the Internet as a resource when they were looking for affordable accommodations in Colombia; families adopting from Colombia must travel to the country and stay there for a month to six weeks. Through the Internet, the Deyos arranged to stay with a missionary in Bogota at a much more affordable cost than the $75 per day hotel costs most families encounter.

An editor for a computer magazine, Steve was able to continue business as usual during his stay in Bogota by establishing an Internet account. He stayed in contact with his office through e-mail, and modemed the articles for his magazine, including edits and final layouts, back to his office. Steve has also started information gathering for the future possibility of adopting a third child, but he and Maureen insist, “It’s at least a couple of years away.” (ARA)

Courtesy of Article Resource Association; www.aracopy.com; e-mail: info@aracopy.com