Suzanne Miller is a retired Navy commander, who supplemented that uniformed service by civilian service in the office of the Chief of Naval Operations and the National Security Agency. Miller was an executive, program manager and staff scientist in several of the nation’s largest and most respected aerospace firms. For ten years she also was president of her own consulting firm, leading teams of highly-skilled scientists and engineers in successfully “doing the impossible” on issues of national importance. Between times, she also served for five years as the lay vicar of an Episcopal parish and now serves as a writer on spiritual subjects as well as singing both within the country and worldwide in prestigious choral groups.

As you read through the above bio blurb, you might think, “How did she do all that?”

The simple answer is I was just fortunate to have my human potential awakened. It started with growing up in a small town in Southeast Virginia. A lot of good people lived there, but their views of what were appropriate life goals for a young person like me were somewhat limited. This was the 1940s and 1950s.

I felt, in my gut, that I had to get out of that town before it destroyed me. What brought me joy was art, music and literature. How to get out? Ah! Go to college.

When I talked to my high school guidance counselor, she asked me how much money my dad was willing to pay for my education. None! He didn’t think my goals were realistic or appropriate–I was on my own. She then told me the only way I could go to college was to get a full scholarship (affirmative action had not yet been invented) and with my school record that would be impossible. In desperation, I asked “impossible?” Not totally impossible, but very improbable. To get the full scholarship I needed, She said I would have to drop all my art, music and literature classes, take only math and science, and get all A’s for the remaining three semesters. “We both know that is an unrealistic goal”.

After that “pep talk” I proceeded to do exactly what she said I needed to do and won a full Westinghouse science scholarship.

Some would say it was luck. I say it was desperation. Nothing beats motivation to unleash a person’s innate capabilities. The wisdom of what I had done was apparent when a year or so later I came home from college for Christmas. I was boarding the streetcar to go downtown and buy a few presents when I noticed a young woman sitting there with a small baby in her arms.

I had played first clarinet in the school orchestra and she had sat right beside me. I sat down beside her. She looked terrible. She told me her short, simple story. She had done what people expected of her and gotten married right out of high school. Her husband was a drunk and he regularly beat her. She said her life was a living hell and the only reason she didn’t kill herself was she couldn’t leave her small child unprotected. She said those days when we played together in the school orchestra were the best days of her life and she had no good days since.

I hugged her and started crying. I wept doubly-once for her and once for me. There, but for the grace of God, it might have been me.

For me, college was no picnic. I was studying engineering and I hated it. On top of everything else, this was the University of Virginia, a rich kid’s school. Everyone told me I didn’t belong there. One professor even threatened to frame me about some test papers “because I didn’t belong there, and he was going to make it his goal in life to get rid of me”. What could I do? I went to the Dean’s secretary and told her what had happened. Her advice was clear, “If you fight him, he will destroy you. Take the ‘F’ and retake the course the next semester with a different professor”. I said, “How can I bear this?” She said, “Take the abuse in stride and never forget the taste of oppression”.

I did what she said and did graduate.

My last summer before graduation was spent in Washington, D.C. I’d gotten a job as a student intern at the Navy Department. A friend from school was doing the same thing and he had a car, so we decided to go out on the town (platonically) and enjoy the scene. I could sing. My friend and I crashed a party at the Swedish Embassy. He was Scandinavian and was known to them, but I was not. After successfully getting through the door I started wolfing down hors d'oeuvres and washing them down with champagne (I had not eaten for three days). One of the staff came up and said he heard I was a singer and asked if I would sing.

As it turned out, my idol was a young Swedish girl named Monika Zetterlund. She was the same age as me and has just become a star back in Sweden. I had memorized all her hits. I handed my friend my champagne glass, hopped up onto the piano, and started singing her greatest hit, in Swedish. Many in the audience were young Scandinavian guys in their 20s. They tended to share several traits in common. They were oversexed, very sentimental, liked to drink to excess, and very patriotic (and very cute). Consequently, this attractive young American just blew all their fuses. I was asked to come back and sing for pay. I later also started singing at the French Embassy (thanks to my high school French teacher).

I was set for life. This was going to be my career. Screw engineering! Then disaster hit. I lost my singing voice. The doctors said lesions were growing on my vocal cords, but they couldn’t figure out why, so they couldn’t help me. Bye-bye singing career!

I went back to school, got my engineering degree and then got a regular Navy commission base on my skills.

As you look over the things I’ve done over my life, there is a common thread. I was discovering who I was. All human beings are precious, unique creations. Nobody else has ever been or ever will be who we each are. We are conceived with an individualized “blueprint” and our mission in life is to unfold and blossom as that person. God gave us the beacon of feeling joyful to guide our way forward.

When we are feeling the joy, we are “on the beam,” so to speak. We are also designed to be limited in capability, have human limitations in wisdom and strength. We are able to minimize trouble due to these limitations by learning to ask for and receive God’s guidance and assistance to get us through our difficulties brought on by those limitations. We also can also get some of the help we need by being in proper relationship with other people whom we love and who love us. If we “chase the joy” long enough, we discover we are growing in one area where we are not designed to be limited–love.

My recently published third book, “Walking in Love: Why and How?”, presents a simple process that can be used by anyone to do the walk I’ve just described. It’s not a dogmatic work. Its authority depends on the confirming experience of each individual to provide the necessary validation of what is being said.

There’s one more important matter I need to mention–aging. It turns out each of us has an individualized “aging clock” within us that determines how we age. In other words, a major dimension of aging is built into us. Some other aspects of aging are just wear and tear on various parts of our body. Some of this is medically repairable and replaceable. A major component of aging, however, is psychological involving peer pressure to think, act and be a certain way–to “act our age.” Everyone should try to get a handle on how each of these processes are at work in their own, individual case and explore whether such aging can be slowed.

I am 83 years old. I was disabled for ten years by a severe heart attack. Good medical diagnosis and treatment repaired my heart and, four years ago, the doctors eventually found and treated the auto-immune source of my disability.

Even better, the same auto-immune disorder was the reason I lost my singing voice in my early 20s. The treatment also, unexpectedly, brought back my singing voice. I now tour the country and the world singing, and I’m much better than I was when I was young. I recently released my first album of songs, titled, “It Ain’t Over Till It’s Over.”

Read my book for the details and to learn the process. Go onto my web site: www.suzannermiller.com, check out my recent photos, read excerpts from my books, see my CD and hear one of the songs.

Then, maybe you will understand why one of the most important lessons in my life is, “Never give up. Always choose life over death. Humans are terrible at forecasting the future.” Look at what I would have missed had I not been so damn stubborn about refusing to die.

May God bless you as He has blessed me!